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  • Writer's pictureBecky Upchurch

Owning the Changes You Want for Your Life

I think the case can be made for women being THE most powerful force on this planet. The problem is, we often don’t realize it…or we do, but we choose to stay small rather than put ourselves out there in a way that allows us to OWN our own power and use it to better our lives and the lives of those around us!


As a coach, I have worked with women who stepped into their own power by:

- Losing weight and getting control over their health

- Building a business while balancing the responsibilities of a day job and a family

- Putting themselves out there in pursuit of a job they really want

- Taking control over their time and their schedule

- Letting go of self-defeating stories

- Creating a multi-part action plan for growing a business


Because you see, when you MAKE THE DECISION to step into your own power, you can accomplish almost anything.


That said, change is hard.


As a Transition & Growth Coach, I am a person who has opted to dedicate my life to working to understand change and helping others navigate through it to achieve their goals. And you know what? Change is HARD.


I know firsthand how badly you can want something and how much it can hurt when you can’t seem to get it. I understand fully how frustrating it is when you just can’t seem to make it happen. Even worse, I have felt the defeat that comes with change that happens TO you that you really didn’t want and aren’t sure how to deal with.


But you know what else I know? I know the excitement of seeing success.

I know the energy that comes from pursuing something that has meaning, even if you’re “not there yet.” And more than anything, I know the feeling of NOT doing those things…and doing the work of change is WAY better.


Do I have this change thing all figured out? Nope. But I might argue that anyone who says that 100% do might not be 100% honest. Because change is hard…and complicated…and messy. But one thing I CAN tell you…is that it can be the best kind of mess there is! So take the risk to do a difficult thing. Because even if you never make it to your destination, I’d wager that the journey to try to get there will be well worth it!


So if you want to make changes to create something different for yourself or your life, what is the first thing you need to do in order to be successful? You need to OWN THE CHANGE.


So what does that look like?


First, you have to identify with SUPER clarity what it is that you want. For example, instead of saying “I want to be done with hating my job,” you might say “I want to find work that uses my skill as a writer while simultaneously allowing me to feel like I am contributing meaningfully to the world.” If your desired outcome isn’t CRYSTAL CLEAR to you, you’re going to struggle with figuring out how to move forward!


Then, once you’ve clarified your vision for what the successful change will look like, you need to connect to WHY you want that change. How will it impact your life? What will be the benefits? What needs will it fulfill? What will look different in your life once it happens? How will you feel once the change you want comes to be? Really process the IMPACT of this change, as that will help you to keep pushing forward when challenges arise.


Next, you need to create a PLAN OF ACTION for how to move forward. Start with the first small step that will help to kick-start your motivation, then build from there. Identify the incremental steps between you and the result you want, and craft a plan for what you will do when in order to get to your desired outcome.


Now obviously there are more steps in the process and more things to consider along the way, but at this point, you are well on your way to where you want to go! So remember, OWNING THE CHANGE is the critical first step to ever achieving it.

A little bit of clarity and planning can go a long way!

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